To Leave or Stay: The Dilemma of Wanting More

I’ve lived in El Paso, Texas, my whole life. This city has given me amazing people—people I hold dear to my heart. No matter where life takes me, El Paso will always be home. But there’s a part of me that yearns to leave.

For so long, I’ve been afraid to take the leap. I don’t want to risk destroying what I’ve built here—years of hard work and dedication to creating something bigger than myself. But the truth is, I want more. I crave more. And I’m not sure I’ll find it here.

I want to explore. I want to see what’s out there. But the thought of leaving scares me. It terrifies me. Still, I feel it’s necessary. Risks and action have to happen because the longer I stay, the further my dream of becoming something more drifts away.

Yes, there’s the argument that you can have it all and stay, but the world is so big. Here, I feel isolated, like I’m living a life of delusion—creating this narrative in my head about how great I am.

The truth is, I don’t know true greatness. I live in this illusion to comfort myself, to make myself believe I’m something greater than I am. But deep down, I know that to truly find greatness, we have to seek it out. We need to surround ourselves with it.

At least, that’s what I think. I’m not entirely sure yet, but I do know one thing: my time here is fading.

El Paso, I will always love you.